Boundaries and Social Media
Okay, I need to vent, big fucking time.
As of late, I have noticed how some people seem to be unable to really understand what is appropriate in public and in the online realm vs. what is not. I can’t help but know how it feels to be pushed inwards on the boundaries you have put up. I’m a fairly private person, I’ll open up to you if I trust you, however, I like to have my space and generally, I enjoy being independent. I discovered that when I was single for about 2 years of my life, I learned to go to concerts alone, grab coffee alone, go to Chapters and browse books on my own. I enjoy it. But lately, I feel like I haven’t been able to do that. I’m working on re-positioning the boundary lines because it’s all a little too much, especially in the last month.
You can be best friends with someone, but also have your own identity. I have my own interests, a variety of them, you may like them too but what are your interests beyond the influence of mine? (i know i may sound like a complete pretentious bitch right now, but finding your own interests and pushing yourself is a part of growing up).
I don’t understand how some people can be so naive or oblivious. If I am going to an event, and don’t throw an invite your way… do NOT ask to come! Not only does it make me feel extremely uncomfortable, as a person who has anxiety and has an incredibly hard time saying “no”… it also puts me in a really shitty fucking position where I have to say no. Don’t leave the door open for me to have to say no. If you actually were considerate of my feelings and my anxiety, you wouldn’t ask to come, you would wait for an invite, and if it doesn’t come, then there’s your answer to your question.
It blows my mind how many people lose all sense of reality while in the “online world” such as fb, twitter, tumblr, instagram, and what have you. Perpetually “liking” something for the sake of hoping for attention and validation from people isn’t healthy. Constantly having the need or urge to comment on things in hopes of getting noticed in order to have your need for attention is not healthy. Hell, I know we’re not perfect, I know I have been guilty of over “liking” things online but I try to just use my judgement and consider if I actually like said post and even then, I still use my judgement. Social media is not a free for all for everyone to just use it as a tool to bash someone, or harass someone. I am so fucking tired of people using social media as some sort of scale for popularity.
Validating your behavior that lacks the respect for social norms and boundaries by telling people that don’t matter to “fuck off” is one thing.. but publicly saying it to those that do matter and then not realizing your blatant disregard for the instability of your behavior is another. I’m not saying that everyone has to be perfect in the online world, I am saying use your fucking judgement…
Respect people’s boundaries, including those on social media.
*end rant*… there’s so much more but i don’t know how to express it without feeling like im going to fucking throw my laptop out the window.